vivir JUNTOS

While living here I have been doing a lot of thinking about community. I have been thrust into a new and unfamiliar world, and sometimes it is so difficult not to revert into my comfort zone, to hide within myself, to hold back. Other times, though, I have little choice but to just ... live! One of the continuing jokes about me both in the office and at home is that I'm like a "niña" (little girl) in so many ways ... I have to depend on other people for EVERYTHING! I don't really like feeling incompetent ... but I am definitely learning so much, especially about what it means to be part of a unit rather than living my life as an independent individual. I decided to write a poem about the experiences that are teaching me this. The formatting is a little off here, but you get the idea. It's called "Vivir JUNTOS" (To live together)


VIVIR JUNTOS

Vivir juntos …
Means that when we come across a boulder blocking the path of the car,
We all get out and push.








When the gringa takes a bucket shower for the first time,
Mamá gently sponge bathes her, wiping away the dirt.
No shame.

Involves meetings that go for hours … lots of yawning … boredom …
I don’t understand, but I am. I am there.





Means we all eat the same food.
Even if we don’t like it. Even if it’s burned. Even if we aren’t used to it.
We eat together.
And when there is no food,
we don’t. No one does.









Means your friend is mine. Your sister is mine.
Your newborn daughter is my niece. I rejoice in her life with you … as much as you do.
I hold her to my heart.
Is laughter and tickles. When I make a mistake, you laugh … and so do I.
Your joy is mine. My joy is yours.
Is cuddling in bed. Is sharing body heat in the cold of the night.
Is placing your cold feet under my warm ones.
Is crying with you. Is hearing your story as if it were mine.
As if I had been beaten by my own brother.
As if I had been threatened by my own husband.
As if I had been neglected by my own mother.
Is entering your hurts without trying to escape, explain, fix.
Means washing clothes and cooking and cleaning on Saturdays. No one leaves until we’re done.
We.
Means watching TV. Lots of it. Disney movies I have seen a thousand times.
Only now in Spanish.
Means learning more than teaching.
Validating what you know.
Accepting.
Quietly. Patiently.
Means being late. Waiting for you to
brush your hair, finish your knitting, drink your tea, change your clothes again …
Involves being without doing.
Involves taking interest in what interests you.
Involves disagreeing but respecting. Being offended but not lashing out.
Offending but accepting forgiveness. Listening and not just hearing.
Means crowded buses, forced to all but embrace you, a stranger sitting on my lap.
This is how we go to work together.
Means that when I’m angry at you, you can tell. And I tell you.
And we still do life together.
When I look sad you ask why. And I tell you.
Or if you don’t ask why, I don’t hold it against you.
Sharing. When you are hungry, you buy 2 oranges.
One for you and one for me.
When there is only one mattress,
We sleep on it together.
Sacrificing. When it’s your turn to pay, but you don’t have anything,
I pay. Without worrying that you’ll pay me back.
When I want to sleep, but you want to talk,
I listen.
Accompanying. When I have things to do, but you have an errand to run,
I go. Without rushing you.
When you want me to be more than I think that I am,
I am.
Waiting.
And waiting.
And waiting. Why am I here? To be with you.
Your reality is my reality is our reality.
Vivimos JUNTOS.


May God continue to teach us to rely on one another and to rely on Him. What a blessing to live in community! Thank you for being in community with me by sharing my experiences through reading this blog and through praying for me. I am so blessed!!

Love, Christinita